How long will you grieve for Saul?

The other day I found myself realizing that I was grieving. Grieving what I walked away from, who I walked away from and what I couldn’t go back to, “my life”. Then I thought of the Scripture (thank you Holy Spirit) 1 Samuel 16:1

THE LORD said to Samuel, “How long will you grieve for Saul, when I have rejected him as king over Israel? *Fill your horn with oil and go; I will send you to Jesse the Bethlehemite, for I have chosen a king for Myself among his sons.” [AMP]

and it hit me, I have not completely understood that I was in the season of grieving the person I was that the Lord rejected. It sounds hard when you read the Lord rejects, yes, he does. The life I was living, the life I planned, the life I thought I had control of, the life I struggled to sustain was not the life the Lord saw for me. So when I declared Him as my savior, refuge, friend, father, husband, brother, etc., I was no longer my own but His. Now understanding I was His, led me to surrender the life that was not a true reflection of a child of GOD, the alpha and the omega, the creator of heaven and earth.

Now that I’ve read 1 Samuel 16 with the Holy Spirit as I type this, I understand that I can grieve, yes, I can grieve old me but not for too long. THE LORD wants to pour oil in my horn so I that I may be able to pour it on others when He calls me to do so. My elder sister/mother-in-Christ who always drops a word worth writing down said on the prayer line this past week

“Change is a process, not an event.”

Renewing of the spirit, mind, body, soul in Christ comes with a newness. Being set apart by GOD in the wilderness-with GOD is beautiful, yet you can get frustrated and uneasy because you aren’t used to the wilderness, your uncomfortable being in the presences of completeness [HE is wholeness]. Leaving chaos and dysfunction that you’ve learned to function in can lead you to understand why some of the Israelites didn’t make it to the promised land.

My prayer I will leave here to enrich our relationship (individually and collectively) is to pray understanding and intelligent insight become your intimate friends [Proverbs 7:4] so that you can stand in every season of the rising sun knowing that there’s no losses but lessons, growth, and wisdom in the Kingdom of Heaven.

“Grieve my brothers and sisters but don’t stay in the graveyard, because at the cross, Christ died in the flesh but His spirit birthed an eternal kingdom of life.”

– Kesha Alein